Pennsylvania Family Law and Divorce
Lisa Marie Vari & Associates, P.C.

The "Silver Linings" of Divorce

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Our Pennsylvania Divorce attorneys always strive to assist our clients through transitional periods in their lives, whether it is after a divorce, during a custody battle, or at the beginning of any family law matter. Attorneys earn the title of "Counselor" in more than one way when practicing family law - they are both counseling their client through the legal aspects of divorce, support, or custody, as well as counseling them personally through a significant life change.

Because this can be tumultuous time for our clients, we try to mention the "silver linings" of divorce - or the positives that come from the situation, so that they can experience a smooth transition into their new life. Diana Mercer, author of Making Divorce Work: 8 Essential Keys to Resolving Conflict and Rebuilding Your Life, recently authored a blog for the Huffington Post entitled "Divorce Silver Linings." Throughout this blog, Mercer described how she found her own "silver lining" in the divorce process, and offers similar tips for readers.

Mercer states that when it comes to divorce, you "can embrace that change and make the best of it, or you can let the sting linger forever." Mercer describes going through her own divorce as a practicing divorce attorney, and how things felt "weird" and "quiet" after all was said and done and she was no longer married. The following tips from Mercer are generally applicable to anyone going through a divorce:

1. Clean and reorganize. If you are still living the marital residence, things about your ex-spouse might be all over the place, reminding you of him/her and the divorce process. Mercer suggested cleaning the house, donating and giving things away that you no longer want, and attempting to re-decorate or make some small affordable changes around the house. Move the furniture to where YOU want it to be!

2. Look into things that spark your interest or that you have always been curious about. Have you always wanted to try joining a gardening club? Thinking about joining a gym? Been meaning to get a library card so you can start reading more? Do things that you have always wanted to do, but have never had the chance to do. Why not? What better time than now to recharge your life and try new things!

3. Get more involved with your kids (or in your community). Maybe you've always thought it would be fun to be the assistant coach of your daughter's softball team, or the volunteer Mom to bring snacks and drinks to peewee football practice. Perhaps there is a local charitable organization that you would like to become involved with. With your extra time, try to volunteer in ways that benefit your children and allow you to give back to your community!

Mercer's advice is to find your own "Silver Lining" throughout the divorce process. Evaluate your life and your interests - and try something that you would have never otherwise attempted while you were married. You never know who you will meet or what will happen if you try something new. It could just be that one new activity that re-defines you as a single-and fun person!

Our attorneys at Lisa Marie Vari & Assocites, P.C. are experienced in counseling our clients through life changes. If you would like to speak to an experienced Pittsburgh family law attorney today, contact us!

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