Your Allegheny County divorce lawyers bring you their latest thoughts:
In most Western Pennsylvania divorce cases, clients are generally most satisfied with the end result of their case when they are able to settle the matter amicably out of the courtroom. This allows the parties to tailor a settlement to their unique situation instead of allowing a family court judge to make all of the decisions in their case. As Pittsburgh family law attorneys, our client’s perception of the end result-and their ability to feel closure at the end of a divorce-are very important matters to us in this highly emotional process. Therefore, today we will discuss six barriers to settlement and how a family law attorney might assist their client in overcoming these barriers and settling their case.
Richard J. Dehmer, Licensed Psychotherapist and Divorce Consultant, has recently provided family law professionals with his “Barriers to Settlement: Working with Divorcing/Separating Parents.” Mr. Dehmer calls these “hazard signs” to look for with your clients during the divorce process. These are Mr. Dehmer’s Six Barriers to Settlement:
1. Having a parent who cannot accept their situation. This is the person who is not necessarily dealing with reality, and has not fully accepted that they are going to be divorced at the end of this process.
2. A person/parent who fails to reduce the reigns of control. This is a person who wants to be in total control, and does not want to compromise with their spouse because that would mean giving away the power that they have.
3. Mr. Dehmer calls number three the “misaligned perception.” This is the person who during the divorce process has a heightened sense of paranoia and says things like “everyone’s against me,” or “I feel like I’m all alone here.”
4. A person with increased self-serving motives – who is either not looking out for his/her spouse’s interests whatsoever, or is not considering the effects on the parties’ children, would fall into this category.
5. One parent’s attempt at alienating the children from the other parent is common in a divorce where children are involved. This ends up getting in the way of settlement because parents feel a sense of bitterness and resentment toward one another, which prevents them from working amicably together.
6. Lastly, Mr. Dehmer claims that lack of flexibility and increased rigidity in individuals is a barrier to settlement, which prevents parties from working together and compromising.
In order to create an environment where settlement is possible, a Pittsburgh family law attorney should recognize and address these six barriers before they become a settlement impediment. If you have questions about your Pennsylvania divorce, contact our Western PA family law firm today!